Revenge recap: Blackout

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May 12, 2013 by Susan Miller

Reunited and it feels... the same?

Reunited and it feels… the same?

Susan: It’s finale night.  Ready to talk about Revenge yet?  Ready to admit that Victoria is NOT a good person?

Steven: I am not ready to admit that Victoria is a bad person.  Look at it from her perspective.  Emily Thorne is trying to ruin her family’s life.  She started by convincing Daniel she’s in love with him and becoming his wife.  I think this might just be another Americans situation where we automatically side with the first characters we meet.  The Soviets need to be foiled in the end, and Emily’s plan for revenge is just not a good plan.  It made the first season very interesting, but as a human being it has made Emily pretty rotten.  Sad truth.

Susan: Victoria doesn’t know that Emily is trying to ruin her family’s life.  All she knows is that Daniel is in love with Emily and Emily broke off the engagement last year.  Also, she seems to think that Emily’s not in love.  Victoria is just playing snotty momma bird because she sees Emily as her competition.  This is particularly annoying because Victoria is not all that nice to Daniel most of the time.  She’s constantly using him as a pawn in her schemes AND she killed his poetry dreams.  If she really loved him enough to be so protective of him, she’d be behaving very differently.  Only then will I buy that she MIGHT POSSIBLY be a good person.

Emily has never been a good person and has been ruined by Takeda.  Nolan and her father tried to keep her from this path, but alas, no luck.  I feel like maybe Aiden is getting the closest to helping Emily become a good person, but it’s very hard to root for him because he’s so actively screwing up Emily’s plans.

Did the Falcon give Nolan the keys to setting off Carrion?  Was it planned all along?  Is there a worse actor on TV than the girl who plays the Falcon?

Steven: She does know!  Emily doesn’t love Daniel; therefore, her plot must be sinister.  There may be some mama bird in there, but I really think it’s a distrust of Emily that has turned her.  (If she is the villain in the end, I’ll feel like the biggest dummy–or I’ll blame the writers.)

Yeah, I don’t know how this whole Aiden situation is going to play out.  It seems like a very end-game scenario.  If this were a movie, we’d be in the last fifteen minutes.  However, this isn’t a movie.  Emily can’t live happily ever after at the end of this season–not if they want to keep this puppy going. That being said, I still want Aiden to be successful, even if it seems impossible at this point.

If the writers really do care about their audience, they’ll end this season with the Falcon, Declan, and Charlotte getting on a plane for that island from Lost.  Only they won’t come back this time.

Hopefully this Carrion business will be good.  What if it goes from a Hamptons melodrama to a post-apocalyptic story of survival?  That would makes things interesting!

Susan: I don’t think I can handle these people without their fancy houses and clothes and parties and art.  Remember how boring Nolan became when they took him out of the party scene?  And Ashley?  It just doesn’t work.  I did get excited about the possibility of everyone moving to Paris and running into new, rich, snooty people with lots of secrets.  It doesn’t look like that’s the focus of the finale though, so I’m guessing that all of the interesting plot developments from this episode will be abandoned entirely in the finale.  It doesn’t even look like the power stays off that long.  And it looks like the whole climax is Emily telling Jack the truth.  Isn’t that the endiest of end games?  I don’t feel good about where this is going at all.

I think Emily is still in love with Daniel, despite her best intentions.  Sure she’s “with” Aiden and sure Daniel’s a Grayson and the Graysons are the enemy, but she seems much more comfortable with him than with Aiden.  Aiden’s got too much baggage and he’s too much of a loose cannon.  I don’t get the feeling that Emily wants a lot of challenges in her relationships.  Harsh but true.

What did you think of the Charlotte pregnancy bombshell?  Will the Porters just keep having a baby a season?  Is that a thing now?

Steven: I’ll start with Charlotte.  Here is my biggest proof for the futility of her character.  I 100% forgot she was pregnant.  We JUST watched that episode, and yet when I read that line I had to really really really really think about it.  Did she drop a bombshell?  Whom did she tell?  Were they on the dock?  My mind is a blank.

I also agree that these folks wouldn’t be very interesting in other settings, which is why I propose a plot-heavy finale, one with instantaneous climate-change and people falling through roofs and wild wolves chasing other people as they try to retrieve medicine–could that all happen in one hour?  It can!

If there are enough dogs, maybe we won’t remember that the Falcon can’t act.

Susan: Okay, finale predictions.  What’s going to happen?  Who’s going to die?  Will there be a cliffhanger?

Steven: I predict there will be a literal cliff hanger.  The Falcon–who is also revealed to be a pupil of Takeda’s–and Aiden will be fighting on the roof of a sky scraper.  When Aiden lands the fatal blow, killing the Falcon, her final action will be to knock him mostly off the roof.  Now Aiden is hanging by his fingers, Henry-Knight-style. Directly beneath Aiden: Emily Thorne tying her shoe as she stops mid-jog.  Across the street on the next roof: the Initiative aiming a high-powered sniper rifle right at Emily.  Above the Initiative: a helicopter being flown by Nolan, who has only just recently reviewed a helicopter manual Chuck-style while Jack and Ashley and Conrad all struggle over a handgun.  Then in the last twenty seconds–back at the Stowaway–Declan Porter trips on a martini olive while descending the staircase.  His arms go flying comically about his person and his head comes down on the bar with a thud.  Immediately a thousand mice descend on his now-dead body, eating up all vestiges of the worst character that ever tried to impersonate Jess Mariano and failed.  Season 2 over.

What do you think will happen?

Susan: I think Jack will get shot and Victoria will find out almost everything about Emily, but then refuse to put the pieces together in a logical way next season.

But I much prefer your version.  Except for the mice eating Declan.  He could die in a Ted Beneke fashion, in one of his signature v-neck t-shirts and I would be just fine with that.  As long as Charlotte has a nervous breakdown upon seeing him and spends the rest of the series in a mental hospital, occasionally spouting truisms about Nolan and Emily, ala Professor Trelawney.

One last question for you: some seem to think that Takeda isn’t dead yet.  Your thoughts on his status?

Steven: I think they’re just remembering fondly how Victoria didn’t die twenty-thousand years ago.  No, I think he’s dead-dead.  Or if he isn’t, he should be.

Susan: Amen to that.  Takeda turned out to be even more of a dead-end than Emily’s mom.  Onward and upward.

Finale time, y’all.  Thanks for slogging through this season with us.  See you on the other side.


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