Revenge recap: Return of the Red Pen

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January 10, 2013 by Susan Miller

Just like the good ole days!

Just like the good ole days!

The red pen is back!  The red pen is back!  The rest of the show still doesn’t make much sense, but that’s okay, because that beautiful red pen is back!

Will Declan and Charlotte be floating at the bottom of the Hamptons with the Amanda?

Susan: I was so excited to see Declan and Charlotte on the Amanda while the Stowaway got raided.  I thought for sure this was the episode that it all went down, and they finally blew up that terrible, terrible subplot for good.  Instead, the bad guys (I’m too annoyed with this storyline to even look up their names) planted the drugs and gun on the boat and Jack got sent to jail for it.  Great.  With Jack in jail, that means we’ll get even more Charlotte and Declan time.  Mike Kelley (creator of the show) seems to be pretty aware and responsive to fan criticism (see: return of red pen, Emily and Daniel back together), so I would think he’d want to ditch the dead weight as soon as possible.  Then again, he seems pretty committed to keeping the Stowaway story in Dullsville, so maybe I’m giving him too much credit.  Bottom line: if they kill off both of them to wrap up this story, it will all be worth it.  Anything less is unacceptable.

Steven: I kind of feel like we’ve been promised this.  I feel entitled to a dramatic (okay, melodramatic) and poorly acted (okay, not acted at all) demise for these two teen-non-heart-throbs.  (Remember when Aaron Spelling tried to sell us his daughter?  Yeah, I’m that indignant about these two.)  I know rationally that the body in that boat is going to end being one of the Ryan brothers, but wouldn’t it be a treat if Declan and Charlotte were sent out to sea in a leaking boat, a shark ate Charlotte whole, Jaws-style, and Declan died of poor decision making skills and whining?  I will not be appeased until that exact episode happens!

Unrelated: where’s Padma these days?

Will Aiden break bad?

Susan: It’s not going to end well, is it?  I would care, except that they refuse to give Aiden any sort of straightforward back story, so I don’t really know enough about him to care what happens.  Daniel and Emily, however, have great, beautiful, soap opera chemistry together.  Aiden never stood a chance.  Maybe he can hook up with Ashley so that she can stay on the show.  Maybe they’ll break bad together, just like she tried to do last season with Tyler.  Man, I miss Tyler.  He was such a perfect villain for this crazy show.  So yes, I think Aiden will break, and give in to the Initiative, for whatever complicated thing it is they want.

Steven: I so hope he doesn’t.  I think that would be bad news for Emily in the long run, and since we are all obviously rooting for Emily, I think that would be a disservice to the show.  However, as we have clearly seen with Emily, revenge can make a character do just about anything.  That being said, I do believe that Aiden could trade in Emily for a real chance at getting his sister back in one piece.  Now, is he dumb enough to believe that he can actually get her back by cooperating with the Initiative?  That’s a different question entirely.  I don’t see the situation working out in Aiden’s favor if he betrays Emily.  My prediction is that he will work with Takeda and Emily to flush out more information about his sister.  That’s what a hero would do, and I want to believe that Aiden is heroic.  Knowing my luck, though, he will do the stupid thing and everyone will be dramatically worse off just in time for the start of season 3.

Stray Thoughts

Man, Daniel is a dummy.  He somehow managed to steal his father’s company from him (please don’t make me try to remember how that happened) and now his company’s information is getting hacked by all sides and he has no idea.  All he cares about is putting Emily in charge of charitable donations and perfecting the pretty pout.  If you think about it, he’s the worst possible match for Emily, but somehow, you never think about that when they’re on screen together.  The pretty just sucks the thinking right out of you.

I suppose we should mention that Nolan was wearing two collared shirts in this episode.  I suppose we should also mention that it’s kind of embarrassing and awful that he has to pick between two ethnic CFO love interests.  They’re pretty much the same character, except for their gender.  Again, we’re supposed to care, but it feels more like a test case to see whether people like Nolan better gay or straight.  Me?  I like him better as an annoying customer at the Stowaway.  Sigh.  Remember how fun season 1 was?  Seems so long ago…

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